Intentional Stones

Make It Work

 

As the ever-inspirational Tim Gunn says...

I've been gone a long time. Not impressed with my writing, with this blog, with my work. But I have carried on.

I had a bit of a blow, professionally, this year, when I applied to 8 different art shows, sure I would be able to add to my schedule, and none worked out. It brings to mind another little phrase- Pick yourself up, dust yourself off and start all over again.

I've learned from the apps that i need to stop worrying about applications and focus more on getting art made. I do need to work on the photography, figure out my mistakes or set aside enough money to have a pro do it for me.

And to look at what I make and decide when I need art and when I am applying craft. I need to allow room for both. Steps toward craft also help me grow and express as an artist. My current market doesn't support much art.

There hasn't been much room in my life for things like blogging.

I may never even publish this piece. I feel like I have written it about 100 times. And this blog isn't about blogging. Not really. Maybe the problem is I don't know what it's about. Maybe in the next piece I write I will outline my blog for the next year? What do you think?

The blog needs a new look. It needs a plan and a topic. It needs much much love.

I will never be a pro blogger. Do such things even exist anymore? The ones i used to read seem to have gone back to their regular lives or narrowed down to one dimensional topics, farming out other things to guest bloggers.

I don't have just one topic. I just have me. If narrowing is what it takes to get big, getting narrow is not something I am good at.

Point is, this year is a Make It Work year. I think I have found something new in the jewelry and in the business, now it's time to write about it. I would love for you to come with me on this journey this year.

 

-Simbelmynë

 

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Just Writing

Last time I mentioned that wintertime was kind of grinding me down. I am looking for my energy back. I know that it will feel like coming back to life. My snowdrops are showing themselves and this always means I'll be finding myself feeling normal again. Meanwhile, the exercise, regular sleep and avoiding stress will have to work their magic.

I mentioned love. This metaphor is really resonating. I am currently looking at all the arts centers and bead shops in my area for classes i can take, like a date with my jewelry. Making things without about whether they will be "good enough" for this year and learning new skills really sounds sooo good! Come to think of it, I can do mini versions of this by setting aside time with some of the videos I've collected over the years.

The only problem is, part of my workflow is to make all the projects I am working on or thinking about part of my regular studio environment. Maybe I can get some scarves and cover all that. I don't want to pack them away, their immediacy is very important. Still, a blank slate would be pretty good.

I think I might find some pretties while I am out today.

-Simbelmynë

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All You Need is Love

Art is love.

I mean it, seriously. When I first started making things all the time, I would flit from craft to craft, to the point where any time someone wanted to do a project, i could very easily go down into my basement and get them anything they needed. Never committing, never getting serious, because I knew it would never go anywhere.

I almost got serious with book binding. I even focussed on book preservation in Library school so that I could work on books practically as well as artistically. One intense Christmas season of making books for my relatives caused the relationship to lose it's luster.

Then I met Jewelry. At first I was surprised by sparkling, speaking gemstones. Then natural colors just kept coming. And friends liked jewelry too, so I knew it would fit into my life. So I went deeper, into metal. I became absorbed and all the other crafts disappeared, excepting where they made my jewelry better. Jewelry opened my world to new friends and new experiences.

Jewelry and I have been in a long term serious relationship ever since. We're building a life together. Sometimes we need a little time apart, but we always come back to each other. When I look back at my life, jewelry has always been there, sometimes i just didn't know it.

I realized this month, in the middle of the winter blahs, the ups and downs of Art Show applications, and a difficult commission, that this is a relationship. One with extraordinary rewards as well as difficult times. And so, today, instead of writing about those things, i would write about my love.

(And No, the human Spouse doesn't mind. In fact, he empathizes with every triumph and defeat. Love is wonderful.)

-Simbelmynë

 

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Inspiring Today

I think this winter time block is an annual thing. Something to do with the end of the sales season and the self examination involved in applications. So i am working on ways to reawaken my creativity. Today, I feel like making lists.

 

Enjoying a good video game to relax. Kitting to keep on creating without the self pressure. Morning pages to get stuff out of my head. Reading about gemstones and writing down the stuff I'm learning. Thinking about the types of pieces i'll want for each show i plan to attend this year. Thinking about the people I meet through shows and the internet who are so wonderful, inquisitive and supportive. Making lists. Enjoying an espresso drink or cup of tea. The times when someone makes you a sandwich as they're making their own.

Beautiful things. My daughter dancing, snowdrops, my little son's tiny lego creations, my big son's programs in Scratch, friends who bake, my spouse, melting snow, clusters of crystals, workout buddies, sun streaming through the windows, warm puffy clothes and blankets. Jewelry magazines and websites. Drafting pencils, markers in every color, excellent erasers. Picture windows, books, good tv shows. Beautiful hair. An outfit put together with great fashion sense. Art.

Mindful things. Going to the gym. A well made shopping list. The week's laundry. The evening checklist. The morning checklist. The day's reminders. Good meals. Quiet time.

How do you get back into your stride?

What do you make lists about?

-Simbelmynë

 

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Stress!!!

I had a great conversation on twitter today. It went like this:

 

When i say "vapours" I mean the deeply uncomfortable feeling I get in my chest when i relax or try to go to sleep. Which I originally thought was solely caused by a non-drowsy allergy medicine, but came back to a lesser extent as life got busy this year. I even went in to the ER one night to make sure i wasn't having a heart attack. Two doctors agree that my heart is fine. But seriously, body? Is this anxiety over not being able to do all the things I "should?" Is this the next in a line of physical ailments my body uses to tell me to slow down? Because i seem to have solved the migraine problem and a flu shot seems to be keeping me healthy this season? And we have to find new ways to force me to take a nap?

Ugh.

Look, I am pursuing a lifelong dream. And trying to keep up with duties to my family. And be a good support person for my spouse. And have a home we can all enjoy and share. And maintain friendships...

Is this all too much to ask?

Maslow and I need to have a conversation about this. Because he wrote all about his hierarchy of needs, and said that doing something fulfilling would make me happy and sane! Not crazy and stressed out!

So I have cut way back on artificial stress...er, I mean- caffeine.

I am exercising when there's time and workout buddies.

Maybe, I am blogging to let the things bouncing around in my head out more often.

I am making a schedule and sticking to it.

I am asking the people in my house to respect my schedule and keep their own with regards to me.

I am streamlining processes that cause me problems, like comission work and photography.

I an letting things go. And learning to let other people do the things "only i can do".

And I am believing that the best I can do is Good Enough.

 

Will it work? We shall see.

-Simbelmynë

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It gets real

Blogging. It's always something I am not sure about. It's fun but it's uncomfortable. I feel like I am talking to start a conversation, but that doesn't happen. But I seem to carry on. Even if my progress is slow. And it can be all the things I want. I just need to keep trying.

I was just letting out a rant at a friend (I am so sorry, AR!) about the year i established this blog. The year I spent tweeting, setting up carefully timed promotional posts, trying to support other artists blogs and sales,... In other words, spending a lot of time online, not using my blog for my own purposes and putting a ton pressure on myself that never panned out.

I have written a few times about blogging for myself and about the goals of my blog. Even trying to keep that in focus, those goals are not enough. Daily goals create stress. (and a big part of why I am writing today is stress, I'll get to that). Weekly and monthly goals inevitably fall behind. I have looked at endless blog design advice, talking about how people read blogs and how photographs help. But this makes me work too hard at writing and i lose what i am writing about or just stop.

I am pretty good at writing a cohesive and well thought out article, but those are a ton of work and I cannot manage it every day. In November, for NaNoWriMo, i worked on my gemstone research and made quite a lot of progress and had several insights in how I want to work on that, and I want to include that stuff here. But it is more like a long term writing project or a book than an article at a time. One thing at a time. It will be here, but we both need to be patient.

So I will go with my gut and post what I have when I have it. I will mix art, gems, family and me. And people will read or not.

I'll break my current issues into a separate, but related post. So, Part 2: Stress is next.

-Simbelmynë

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An Original

Part of my current design policy, perhaps the part that drags me down sometimes, is the concept of originality. I don't want to put anything out there as "my work" that contains the designs of another.

But c'mon here! This is jewelry and a chain is a chain! Clasps? Only so many ideas work and are readily customizable. Patrons of wearable art do NOT want their necklace to fall off. Lapidary work? Yes, someday I very much want to go there. But for now metal is a life consuming art.

There are a few pieces of progress in my thinking. One is to consider all of these things as textures an colors in my palate. Another is to realize that some things are just too time consuming to be worth it. Finally, I'm exploring some new materials, like braiding embroidery floss to make kumihimo necklaces for pendants and possibly some map or book materials to accent earrings.

Still i don't want to just take pieces i've bought and put them together. A piece feels less special when I haven't hand created everything.

I worry about all these things all the time, sometimes to the detriment of my studio time. Then I face a show with just enough art pieces to accent the table and a bunch of very very simple pieces that I don't necessarily love. It's not a good feeling.

As I become more accomplished, I can hand make more. And I've found a few techniques that I can do while we home school to make accents for simpler pieces that give them a unique touch. Hopefully my efforts are improving all of my art at the same time as eliminating my worry that not everything I make is unique or special enough.

How do you feel about handmade?
-Simbelmynë

New Sketching Habit

Free from expectation-that's what the morning pages have always been about.  Work for long enough to scrub my brain of the bits of dreams or old feelings or doubts. 

In days past, I've tried to do the Morning Pages suggested by Julia Cameron, but writing is not really doing it for me.  Recently, though, I've busted out a little sketchbook and I'm slowly filling it up with doodles.  Some have even lead to very interesting jewelry ideas.  Those I've transferred to my "main" sketchbook.  One with graph lines to easily gauge size and metal needs.  It's pretty cool. 

Homeschooling is gradually feeling like it's under control.  I can work during school hours on little brainless things-like weaving that's repetitive and calming, or sketching that's easy to put down and take back up again.  Especially if it's these little morning pages type sketches.  Who cares if you start a new idea and lose an old one if you're not sweating the finished product? 

I'm on to something here.  Even if I'm not in midst of a formal course like the Artist's Way.  It's helping me to live more visually.  When did I ever learn these habits of pushing the visual away?  It's so natural to me.  Some of my earliest memories are of shape and form and exploring them. 

Now that school's done I can get back to the bench.  Filling my table for the Chili Event won't happen without lots of work!

-Simbelmynë

Because I want to be more in touch

Life is overwhelming.   Whose isn't? 

I promised writing today, here I am.

It's the time of year for things to be waking up.  The flowers, the birds and animals, me.

This year I'm working much harder.  Period

I'm working to be more true to what I really want to be doing.  Working in gemstone.  Working in metal.  You won't see anything from me that's metal that anyone else has made, unless I've had it a while and I've drilled holes in it or added findings to it or taken it apart and put it together.  (see bracelet above, yes those beads were pretty, but only one hole?  Really?  for such a large bead?  they're almost an inch wide!  So I fixed them.)

I spent today working on findings and on the trinket rings that people seem to love.  Thank you all! 

I'm also working much harder on the kids' school.  It's like I have three full time jobs. 

Hence the blog falling off the face of the earth.

We went to Florida and saw breathtaking things, above and below the water.  I hope I'll have time to write about that. 

And the summer is starting to shape up beautifully. 

Save the Date on April 14th, we'll be showing at the Soutside Works I Made It Market's Chili at the Works!  More on this tomorrow.  I'm really excited.

 

Winds of time

Nice dramatic title, eh?

The Wheel of Time books that I'm Still reading, (Yeah at just about 800pp per book and 13 books, it takes this slow reader a while.  Especially checking the Wheel of Time Wiki every time a character is mentioned, And listening to the podcasts a bunch of delightfully foul mouthed geeks are producing, spoilers abound, so if you're not up to date, don't go to either.  I'm a true geek.) start each story with the Wind.  The Wind is almost a character.  It carries the threads started in the prologue into the main part of the book.  A fun literary tool.  Especially when it clues in characters we've been wishing would get a clue.  Like a little gnat biting them.  Ok, maybe it just adds to the frustration.  But if I didn't love these characters, I wouldn't be on my 5th re-read of the series, nor would I be cheering on Brandon Sanderson to get the final book done. 

Anyway, the reason I mention all this, is that the past few months have flown by.

How does time do that?

Since starting the school year, on top of Show Season, on top of finishing the remodeling of the kitchen, on top of everything else, I haven't had time for anything.

I've been disappointed in the studio.  When ever I'm there, I can feel my skills growing and my work getting better!  But I can't spend nearly as much time down there as I'd like. 

I have a number of small commissions I picked up over the summer and fall that are nearly done, but they've been inching along!  (Thank you, if you're one of the people I owe work to.  I know you're looking forward to your pieces.  I wish I was working at any kind of decent pace.)  And I'm only barely making my deadlines.  I have been careful to explain to people that I'm severely limited in my work time, but it doesn't help me in feeling like I'm way too slow. And I have a big set I've been working on for months.  Since the beginning of the year.  That's still not done.  I work a little at a time and try to show my work when it's gotten somewhere.  And I just got a key to the biggest piece, so I hope to get a bunch done this weekend.  It's not that I'm not thinking about these things constantly, it's that I just can't find time to do everything!!!

There.

It's off my chest.

I'm terrible.

I'm not going to take any more commissions until the ones I have are done.  I'm hoping I can clear up 90% of them this weekend.  Putting them ahead of everything else. 

I'm certainly not making excuses.  Time is just moving way too fast lately.

-Simbelmynë